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Same-Sex Couples In Connecticut Tie The Knot, Legally (Hartford Courant)
Thursday, November 13, 2008
By: Daniela Altmaria
With a few perfunctory strokes of the pen at 9:15 a.m. Wednesday, New Haven Superior Court Judge Jonathan E. Silbert brought same-sex marriage to Connecticut. Less than 30 minutes later, at West Hartford town hall, state Rep. Beth Bye and her partner, Tracey Wilson, became the first legally married same-sex couple in the state. Although they had a "wedding" service at their church three years ago, their union is now legally valid, and that "took my breath away," said Bye, a Democrat from West Hartford.
In New Haven, Jennifer Vickery and Peg Oliveira pronounced their wedding vows in front of a bronze statue depicting the leader of the Amistad revolt. With their friends watching and their 3-month-old daughter, Willow, snuggling in a carriage nearby, they exchanged rings and pledged to share their lives "in good times and in hard."
The weddings came after a fervent, four-year legal battle. Eight same-sex couples had sued the state, contending that barring them from marriage was unconstitutional. Last month, the state's highest court agreed. Wednesday's brief hearing in Silbert's courtroom was a necessary formality before gay couples could receive marriage licenses.
Connecticut has now joined the small circle of places where gay men and lesbians can legally wed. The Netherlands, Belgium, South Africa, Spain and Canada all recognize same-sex marriage. In the U.S., Massachusetts is the only other state where same-sex marriage is legal. California's highest court overturned a state law banning the practice earlier this year, but that action was undone last week by passage of a ballot measure.
"Today Connecticut sends a message of hope and promise to lesbian and gay people throughout the country who want to be treated as equal citizens by their government," said Bennett Klein, an attorney with the Boston-based Gay and Lesbian Advocates and Defenders, which litigated the case. "We ... think about the heartbreaking vote in California, knowing that a justice movement is not won or lost by one case or one vote."
For Stephen Davis and Jeffrey Busch of Wilton, Wednesday was bittersweet. As one of the eight plaintiff couples, Davis and Busch said they were thrilled to be able to legally formalize their 19-year relationship. But they were also mourning the loss of marriage rights in California and wondering how last week's vote will affect Davis' sister and her spouse, who were wed in San Francisco during the 4 1/2 -month window when same-sex nuptials were legal in that state.
"Our tears of joy are really diminished," Busch said. "As we're picking out our wedding rings, [they] are staring at their marriage licenses trying to figure out what it all means."
After leaving the court, Davis and Busch and a crowd of gay rights supporters gathered on the steps of New Haven City Hall. The plaintiff couples and Klein held a brief press conference surrounded by bobbing white balloons and sprays of long-stemmed roses.
Reporters and television crews from throughout the region gathered to cover the story, but opening day of same-sex marriage in this state drew far less media attention than nuptials in Massachusetts when that state became the first to legalize them in 2004.
In fact, despite all the smiles, hugs and tears of happiness, the mood was fairly low-key, especially when compared with the battles over gay marriage that have erupted in much of the nation. Unlike California, Connecticut does not have a ballot-measure mechanism that might bar same-sex marriage, though opponents have vowed not to give up their fight. On Wednesday, however, those opponents were nowhere to be seen.
It was not clear how many same-sex couples across the state were married or took out marriage licenses on Wednesday.
When Barb and Robin Levine-Ritterman, another of the plaintiff couples, emerged from city hall with their marriage license, they were greeted by enthusiastic cheers. They are planning a May wedding.
The Levine-Rittermans, who live in New Haven with their two children, have been together for more than 17 years. They have already cemented their relationship with both a traditional Jewish wedding and a civil union.
"We came here several years ago to get a civil union form," Barb Levine-Ritterman said. But, she added, "we didn't do it with pride or joy."
Marriage, on the other hand "is just thrilling. ... Love is love and the state recognizes it."
In its decision, the state Supreme Court ruled that civil unions, those marriage-like legal arrangements that Connecticut has offered to gay people since 2005, are not an acceptable substitute.
More than 2,000 couples have joined in civil unions over the past three years. At least for now, the civil union law remains on the books, though that's an issue the state legislature will likely examine when it convenes next year.
Jenny Penetra and Jen Algarin got their civil union papers in June and had a big ceremony at Elizabeth Park with bridesmaids, a hundred guests and "the whole nine yards," Penetra said. "My dad gave me away."
But it wasn't marriage, a distinction that the couple's three children just couldn't understand.
On Wednesday, they went to West Hartford town hall to collect their marriage license. Now, Penetra said, it is "exciting to be able to tell my kids that Connecticut is one of the only states that treats people fairly."
At 2:30 p.m., the lead plaintiffs in the case, Beth Kerrigan and Jodie Mock, walked into council chambers in West Hartford with their twins, Carlos and Fernando. Supporters and the media closed in around the podium as Town Clerk Essie Labrot handed them their marriage licenses and had them swear to the truth of the information.
Just like that, a four-year journey was over in seconds.
A sob escaped from Kerrigan, and the couple kissed and embraced. Kerrigan was asked if she could explain her emotions.
"No," she said. "It's unbelievable."
"So ridiculously simple," Mock said moments later. "For it to be OK, in seconds — is fabulous."
Mock said she was driven by "the idea that kids can grow up, no matter what their lifestyles, and get married and have a family."
Then the couple walked outside to a swell of applause and shouts of glee from 100 people.
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